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Friday, November 30, 2012

Joy & Sorrow

Just wanted to post these sweet pictures of my girls from today. I am still working on the orphanage visit post and I should have it ready to go by tomorrow. This trip is such a mix of emotions, and as a friend just wrote me, "It seems that this time of your life, joy and sorrow have been closely intermingled." So very true. Thank you all for your thoughtful words to us, and for your love and prayers. Danny and his mom and Britton are about 1/4 of their way through their long flight. Please continue praying for them as they make this long journey home.



Grief

"You think the impact of her years in the orphanage will quickly fade, become less of her life. But grief is deep and abiding, whatever its cause. Grief is not a sudden plunge into darkness, followed by a slow upward incline to the light. Grief moves forward and back, up and sideways. At times it jerks to a stop, and any progress toward healing seems fully and permanently stalled." Jeff Gammage (adoptive father) China Ghosts

When I was choosing quotes for my blog posts for this journey, I chose the above quote thinking our new child would definitely be grieving the loss of all that was familiar to her. Kate grieved significantly when we were here last time and this is what I expected of CC. When I was planning blog posts, I put this quote, for no particular reason, on today. Little did I know the significance of that.
At 4 a.m. this morning, Kate woke us up with a fever. We got up to get her some tylenol and we checked our phones. There were messages on both phones from Danny's brother, Scott, to call him as soon as we could. I knew something was very wrong. Danny went into the other room and called him immediately. It was one of the worst things we could have heard, especially being on the other side of the world ... Danny's father passed away very unexpectedly in his sleep that night. If you have been reading this blog, you know that Danny's mom has been here with us. Danny had to go tell his mom. And in the following whirlwind of shock and confusion and uncertainty, we decided Carolyn and Danny needed to get home as soon as possible. We were able to get them tickets out of Guangzhou all the way to Dallas. They left this morning and have 2 layovers and a long 24+ hours of flying ahead. We also decided to send Britton home with them. My mom and I and the girls will stay the course of the trip, go to our Consulate Appointment on Monday, and fly out on Wednesday morning. We land at home on Wednesday night and will go to Dallas on Thursday to be with the family. They are waiting on us to get there to have the funeral. 
 
This is such a shock. Our family has weathered a lot this year with the loss of my brother. I never imagined we would be plunged back into the depths of sudden and significant loss and grief so soon. Please keep our family in your prayers ... especially Danny's mother, Carolyn, and his brothers, Scott and Ryan. 
I am sitting on a bed in China, between my two beautiful, sleeping daughters ... two girls loved very much by their grandfather. I am sad he never got to hold sweet CC, but I am so glad we got him on FaceTime the other morning. He got to see her in action. I know he would have loved getting to meet this precious child. I am also thankful that our big kids just saw him in early November when we went to my nephew's baptism. And also glad for an August trip to Dallas where we spent a week with them. I hope they always carry him in their memories.
Daddy Doug, as he was known to the littles, had been married to Carolyn for 40+ years. He had 3 sons and 6 amazing grandchildren, who were the light of his life. There will forever be a void in our lives without him. 

Please pray for our family.


Some pictures of Daddy Doug with our children...

Thursday, November 29, 2012

This...

...would have told us so much had we only gotten this picture from the orphanage before Gotcha Day!



Rain Check

Well...it's 8 p.m. here and everyone but me is asleep. It has been a long day and I can barely hold my eyes open. I'm going to have to postpone writing up a blog post until tomorrow morning. So sorry to do this, but my mind is still reeling from the orphanage visit today (in a good way) and I think I need to sleep on it, before I write it out. Until the morning!

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Back to the Island

“God reminded me how beautiful we all are to Him, after all, we were created in His own image, and He looks at me, at you, in all our sweat and dirt and brokenness, and says, "I choose you. You are beautiful.” Katie Davis, Kisses from Katie

"The Lord gives grace and glory." Psalms 84:11
We traipsed all over this city with CC today and she did great...a total trooper. We have noticed that she is calm and sweet and easygoing when we're out and about and she's riding in the Ergo (usually sleeping much of the time) but then her personality really comes out in the hotel room. She loves to cruise and play and bounce and crawl around, and is her happiest doing that. Her favorite is to be standing, though, and she finds a way to get upright just about anywhere. She is very active and changing her diapers and clothes is a chore and a half. She twists and turns and does her best to kick, roll over and get away. She does love her crib. Today, after a late breakfast, I took her into the bedroom and she got so excited when she saw her crib that she started crawling as fast as she could toward it and laughing. Our experience with Lia Kate is just about as opposite as it can be compared to CC! She hated the crib and never went back in one once we got home. She cried a lot when we were in China and she hated the hotel room. CC loves being in the hotel room. 
The last two nights, she has slept very well. We've had to wake her up both mornings. Not so sure how tonight will go, though, as we are all trying to go to bed early and she is up fussing. She usually only cries because 1) she is hungry, 2) she wants to be held or 3) she is tired. Other than that, she is very happy. We have seen her throw a few major fits when I put her down and she doesn't want me to. She can from 0 to 60 back to 0 in all of 10 seconds. It's quite the fiery temper for such a (usually) happy girl.
I love seeing these big brown eyes peer up at me when she's in the Ergo
She wakes up so sweet and happy ... flashing her big smile as she rubs her sleepy eyes. She is a sound sleeper and even slept through me accidentally shattering a coffee cup on the floor this morning. It will be nice to have a sound sleeper in the house and probably a necessity with two 4-year-old siblings. She also sucks her thumb in the most adorable way. She is our first thumb sucker and she will grab the blanket with one hand, pull it to her face and put the thumb of her other hand in her mouth...all with practiced ease. She also likes to have a little bit of blanket on the sucking thumb, and often when she's awake, she just likes to suck on the blanket. This is pretty common among adopted children from China as they are often given washcloths instead of pacifiers as babies. It's a good thing I brought some muslin blankets because that is exactly what she wants in her hands and mouth! We have gotten some belly laughs from her which are just awesome to hear. We feel so blessed to have her as our daughter. She was SO worth the wait...a million times over, she was worth the wait. 
Today, on official business, we went to the police station in the afternoon to apply for CC's Chinese passport. When children are adopted from China, they fly home on a Chinese passport with a U.S. visa in it, and they become American citizens once they are on U.S. soil. I am always amazed at how efficient the Chinese are at these appointments. They never last long and they are ready for you at your appointed time. While at the police station, we saw all the families that we got our children with on Monday. It is fun to run into them here and there and see how different their children are after just two days of having the love, attention and nurturing of parents. 
Beautiful Shamian Island streets
On unofficial business today, we took taxis out to Shamian Island, which is where we stayed during our last adoption. The historic White Swan hotel is under major renovations so it is closed and our agency puts families at another hotel in a different part of Guangzhou. I must say, I miss the peace and quiet of the island. It has historically catered to adopting families as the U.S. Consulate used to be located there, as was the place where the children have their U.S.-required medicals. There are also lots of little stores selling trinkets and wares specifically to adopting families. The buildings there are all colonial architecture and the roads are beautiful, tree-lined, quiet streets. After being in the busy concrete jungle where our hotel is, I miss the island!!! The hotel we are in now has much more space per room. We are in a suite for less than we spent at the White Swan for a small room, so that part is nice. But I miss the peaceful feel of the island. And I really miss Lucy's, where you can order a baby portion of chicken congee and a glass of sweet iced tea. We made sure to have lunch at Lucy's and I hope we go back for dinner there one more time before we leave.
Lucy's famous sweet tea. Southern iced tea served with a side of simple syrup.
How American adoptive parents are/were viewed. Older, balding 
dad with camcorder and camera, older mom pushing a baby girl in a stroller. 
Shopping for girlie shoes on the island
Tomorrow we go to CC's orphanage! I am so excited to go and see the place that she spent her first 9 months in and to meet and thank the nannies who took such good care of her. Zhuhai City is about 2 or 3 hours away from here, so we will load up at 8 a.m. and be on our way with our guide Miko. I did not get to go to Lia Kate's orphanage three years ago because it was so far away (6 hours one way). So, Danny went and met the nannies and took pictures of the orphanage to show her one day. I am so glad he did that, but I really wanted to go. Thrilled to be able to take CC back tomorrow, as I think it is important for her, even at 9 months of age, to get closure and to say goodbye to the people she knew. There is something powerful, I believe, about a child walking out of the orphanage for the last time in their parents arms. And that's exactly what we'll do tomorrow.

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Adoption Day

“The place God calls us to is the place where your deep gladness and the world's deep hunger meet.” Katie Davis, Kisses from Katie

Father to the fatherless, defender of widows — this is God, whose dwelling is holy. God places the lonely in families. Psalms 68:5-6
I am going to make this short and sweet because I am so tired, I can barely hold my eyes open. Today was Adoption Day. CC is officially our daughter in the eyes of China! We went back to the Civil Affairs office and signed the official paperwork today. The rest of the week, we spend applying for CC's Chinese passport and doing the things we need to do in advance of our Consulate Appointment on Monday. 

Today has been a really great day with CC. She is such an easy baby that we keep waiting for the bomb to drop. She is content to ride around in the Ergo, but usually falls asleep pretty fast in it. If we are in our room, her personality comes alive and she is a happy, playful little girl. She continues to amaze us in what she is able to do. Here are a few pictures from today before dinner. I will write more tomorrow. For now, my pillow is calling my name!
I love that her eyes fill up her face!








Monday, November 26, 2012

Gotcha Day!

"A life changed is worth it, even if only one. God's love made known is worth it, even if only to one." -- Katie Davis, Kisses From Katie

He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end. -- Ecclesiastes 3:11


This child is a dream! I cannot believe she is ours. Hard to even know where to begin to tell you about today, but here goes...
We got to the Civil Affairs office at 2:30 and after doing some paperwork, our guide told us that we would be the first to get our baby. We scrambled for cameras, and with grandmas and kids in tow we turned the corner and there she was. I looked at her and she grinned. I reached for her and she flashed a big smile that showed the few teeth that she has. She didn't hesitate at all and she looked all around, taking everything in. She smiled many times at the kids when they loved on her, especially when Britton was around. Her eyes followed him wherever he went. She played with the toys we brought. She never cried. She never looked sad. She just played and looked around and flashed the occasional smile. Very content amidst the chaos of the day and the screams of other children in the room. The room seemed so familiar as it was the place we got Lia Kate in three years ago. Our moms picked out a spot on the couches that happened to be exactly where we sat when we got Lia Kate. Toward the end of our time there, she started getting sleepy, so I put her in the Ergo and she dozed off. 
Big sister and big brother

Holding our Kate in the same room we first held her. She was so excited to be there.

We got to talk with the official from Zhuhai who brought CC to Guangzhou. She is a very sweet woman. She gave us a framed work of art for CC that is beautiful. And also gave us a flash drive with pictures of CC, a photo album, a large container of formula, some rice cereal and a bottle. We are thankful. We also made plans with her to visit the orphanage on Thursday.

After running to the store, we came back to the hotel where she slept in the Ergo for awhile. After her nap (she typically naps from 5 to 6 p.m.), I laid her down on the bed to change her diaper. Imagine my surprise, when she immediately rolled over, got on all fours and crawled a bit, then went to sitting position. The orphanage didn't say anything about her being mobile. CC is only 9 months old but because of typical orphanage delays, I expected her to be a wobbly sitter at best. Um, not the case. She may be small and a preemie, but the girl can move.  I put her down on the floor and she immediately started crawling. I took her next door into the room our moms and kids are staying in and she was all over the place. She crawled over to a stool, pulled up on it to a standing position and started cruising the table! The orphanage didn't say anything about that either. I am still in shock. They did say she was not very cooperative when having her clothes changed. That is true. She isn't cooperative because she wants to crawl away! She is constantly moving, but is one of the happiest babies I have been around. The orphanage was right about that one. They have said this in every update I have gotten on her. She only cried a handful of times today. Once, when she fell down. Once, when I put her down to make a bottle and she wanted to be held. And, once when I handed her to Danny when she wanted me. I'll take that. 

She has made great eye contact with me when I have fed her a bottle...staring at me the whole time and occasionally putting her hand on my face. I can tell she has gotten great care and has been very loved in all of her 9 months of life.

I broke all my rules of what not to do on Gotcha Day...number one being, not to change her clothes and two being, not to give a bath, as both can be traumatizing in such a new situation. But she got formula all over her clothes (she is a messy eater) and she spit up a lot, so I gave her a sink bath and she loved it. Played and splashed in the water. 

She has smiled and laughed too many times to count. She has also babbled some in a sweet little voice. She loves looking at herself in the mirror and she loves "playing the drums" on furniture. She even dances on her little toothpick legs when music is on. 

I thought she would never get tired and fall asleep, but she finally did. After about an hour of cruising the crib, I handed her a soft blankie. She grabbed it, laid down, stuck her thumb in her mouth and started making the sweetest "guh guh guh" sounds. She was fast asleep in five minutes. We will see what the rest of the night holds.

I am going to bed the happiest mama tonight. This little girl is more amazing than I even dreamed she would be. We are thankful for her little life, and that we get to be her parents and love her forever. Soli deo gloria.

Family of 5


With the official from Zhuhai City Social Welfare Institute
  

This is one of my favorite pictures of the day. So typical.

Sisters

Britton wants to hold her cheeks all the time



Fast asleep

You can see how little she is. I'd guess she is about 14 pounds 
and she fits perfectly into size 6 month clothes. Her feet are tiny.

Standing, crawling, cruising. Oh boy.


After a bath, ready for bed